


Ups and Downs (Quarantine Talks)

by Malec_Lover23



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alec Lightwood Deserves Nice Things, Anxious Alec Lightwood, Depressed Alec Lightwood, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, I’ve only been writing, M/M, Magnus Bane Loves Alec Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood Fluff, Married Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Quarantine Talks, References to Depression, References to anxiety, Sad Alec Lightwood, Supportive Magnus Bane, like that’s all I’ve been doing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-02-23 10:43:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23710231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Malec_Lover23/pseuds/Malec_Lover23
Summary: I wanted to take a second and write about anxiety during this quarantine. It affects the best of us, and I know some find relief when they can relate through their favorite characters. However, this does mention the coronavirus and some emotions that are hard to handle. Remember, this is a rough time for everyone, but we're going to come out of this stronger.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 16
Kudos: 81





	Ups and Downs (Quarantine Talks)

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys are doing well and a staying busy. Let me know what you’re doing to stay busy I love trying new things! And if you ever need to talk, please don’t hesitate to talk to me on Wattpad or tumblr Malec_Lover23  
> All my love <3

When Magnus wakes up, Alec isn't beside him. 

He rolls out of bed and wraps a robe around him, immediately noticing how cool the air is in the bedroom. Then he sees the balcony doors are open, and his beloved is sitting on the fire escape, with his favorite blanket wrapped around him. 

Magnus pads through the living room, a spike of concern running through his veins when he doesn't hear the familiar noises of New York as he moves closer to the balcony. He snaps his fingers and a cup of black coffee with two spoonfuls of sugar appears in hand. 

"Good morning, Alexander." 

Alec turns his head and softly smiles, though it doesn't reach his eyes. Magnus' heart shatters for him. 

Ever since Alec couldn't work anymore, and they made all Shadowhunters either stay at the Institute or stay somewhere else until the virus calms down, Alec's anxiety and depression has been at an all time high. 

Magnus gets it, not being able to consistently keep a routine and keep yourself busy is recipe for disaster. 

Alec weighed staying at the Institute during the quarantine, but he knew he wouldn't be working much anyway and the thought of being away from Magnus was even more of reason to stay at the loft. 

It's been three weeks, and they've both gone up and down, but they're together, and Magnus is extremely glad he isn't alone during this. 

"How's your anxiety level?" 

"High." Magnus figured that. Alec won't normally miss a morning of snuggles and lazy kisses, but when he's anxious he's got to be isolated. 

"Okay, is there anything I can do to help?" 

"You're doing it." Magnus sits next to him on the fire escape and hands him the cup of steaming coffee. 

"Thank you." Magnus hums in response and Alec wraps part of the blanket around him, snuggling closer in the process. 

"Why don't you call Jace and Clary at the Institute? Maybe that'll help, hearing their voice."

"Later." Alec answers, pointing to the empty street below them. "I don't know why I keep coming out here. Seeing it so desolate really doesn't help, it just spikes my anxiety." 

Magnus shrugs. "It's an old habit. You love being outside, around fresh air, because you feel trapped inside your own head, so you attempt to make the environment around you better." 

"How do you know me so well?" Alec sips his coffee and hands the cup to Magnus, offering him some. Magnus shakes his head and wraps an arm around Alec's waist. 

"Well first of all, I married you. And we're all creatures of habit. I know what you like, and when things get tough you like keeping busy. Now that you can't do that, your second favorite thing to do is going outside to get away from it all. I suppose that doesn't make it better, especially in this circumstance." 

"I also do the same thing, in case you're wondering." Magnus continues. "That's why I bought a place with a huge balcony." 

"I feel selfish for feeling this way, for feeling so anxious and sad when this isn't even affecting me. People are dying from this, and I'm still sitting here complaining because it's just screwing up my routine and schedule." 

"Alexander, this is screwing up everything. You're not alone, not in the slightest. I guarantee that you aren't the only one who is feeling anxious or depressed right now, in fact I know you aren't. And it's not selfish either, I know you better than that. You have a huge heart, and someone who is selfish doesn't love like you do. It's okay to feel, to experience emotions, and these emotions aren't any less significant than others'. You hear me?" 

Alec nods and rests his head against Magnus' shoulder. "I'm just so tired and antsy at the same time. It's like my mind is saying one thing and my body another. I want to run, I want to get away and meet people and see my family, but I also want to sleep. I'm so drained and tired even though I've just been moping around." 

"The joys of dealing with anxiety and depression during a world-wide pandemic. While it's not fun in the slightest, nothing is wrong with you for feeling this way." Alec finishes his coffee and Magnus sends the mug to the sink. 

"I want to help. I want to help people get better."

"I know, I know your heart. I know you,  
but my darling, you don’t have a medical degree. Staying inside is all we can do. We're all helping just by following guidelines and staying inside. It seems like a dream, honestly, getting to be inside with my husband and having him all to myself." Alec snorts and Magnus smiles, elated that he succeeded in getting Alec to crack a smile. 

"We'll spend more time together. Ugh, the torture." Magnus' eyes light up as he recognizes the words he spoke to Alec's months ago. 

“So you do remember some of things I say.” Alec nuzzles into his neck, pulling the blanket tighter around them. 

“Good news is, at least you’re with me. Can you imagine being quarantined with Jace? Angels above!” Magnus tries to lighten the mood. Alec laughs and shakes his head. 

“Don’t you dare talk about Jace right now. We were having a moment, why do you always have to ruin it with Jace?” 

“Sorry, love.” 

“I do feel bad for Clary right now, though. You do have a point. If I wasn’t staying with you I’d be dealing with Jace and Clary’s shit all day.” 

"Wanna go back to bed? You might feel better after some more rest. Then we can wake up, eat something and see where the rest of the day takes us. Yeah?" Alec nods and Magnus gets up, turning around to tug on Alec’s hands. 

Once Alec’s standing up, he wraps his arms around Magnus’ neck and pulls him close, resting his head on his shoulder. 

“Thank you Magnus, for making everything better.” 

“Of course, I’m glad we’re together during this. Just seeing your beautiful face is enough to make me happy.” Even though Magnus can’t see him, he knows Alec’s blushing. 

“Let’s go to bed.” Magnus squeezes his hand and they curl back up in bed. A little sleep fixes everything.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments make me the happiest on the planet! Also, would you like me to write more about these topics? Let me know!


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